Rock Needs River – Vanessa McGrady

Little A | Hardcover | February 1, 2019

In this honest, witty, and moving memoir, Vanessa McGrady recounts her long and rocky journey to becoming a parent. McGrady explains how she never thought much about having kids until her first miscarriage at the age of thirty-two. It is in this pivotal moment, she says, she became “irreversibly in love” with the idea of being a mom. But like so many other things in life, as McGrady reveals, where we want to go and how we will actually get there are two completely different things. ​

After an assortment of jobs, failed relationships, and two more miscarriages, McGrady finds her rhythm in life and, for a brief moment, love, and she decides to adopt. Of course, as many may already know, the adoption process isn’t as easy as one imagines. But after a few failed matches, McGrady’s patience and persistence pays off: She receives a call about a couple, Bridget and Bill, who are expecting a baby girl. A baby girl who McGrady eventually adopts. A baby girl named Grace.

But rather than part ways, Bridget and Bill continue to drift in and out of McGrady and Grace’s lives. In fact, McGrady even helps the couple with their living expenses and allows them to live in her apartment for six months when they are evicted from their home. It is a decision that McGrady does not regret, but constantly questions. For she fears the emotional impact Bridget and Bill’s erratic presence will have on Grace. As a result, this memoir is as much of a love letter to Grace and a testament to “The Book of Grace”—as her adoption story has come to be called—as it is an exploration of what it takes to build your tribe, to raise a child, and to find your way through this whacky, messy thing called life.